Posts Tagged ‘professional’

Kogi Journalists Stripped – So What?

March 4, 2009

Does it really hurt that the Nigerian Union of Journalists is the only professional body that absorbs blundering journalists and mediocre writers? No, it doesn’t. Not even when its members are stripped or humiliated by government or individuals.
Let their headlines scream blue murder (as above). Nobody would
heed them – not even in Kogi – of all states in Nigeria – where a pack of state house correspondents were disgraced by a visiting banker 19th of February.
But …probably, the Human Rights Watch or some other number-
crunching groups might be interested just in the statistics – not in the calamity – of battered journalists under the nose of the rule-of-law-chanting Yar’ Adua in Nigeria.

For countless reasons, Nigerian journalists are out and away less than human beings. They’re cheap – dozens a penny – and unorganized. They’ve got no fat bank accounts like Reuben Abati’s, Osa Director’s, Bayo Onanuga’s – all top, Abuja-rich editors.
Bait them with brown envelopes, they’ll go to hell to cover anything – trivia like you shitting out your bowels, or pissing around your toilet, or your great grandson learning to call you daddy.
That’s a Nigerian journalist for you – beggarly, impoverished, frivolous, tame, and insecure.
That’s why Atiku – that hopeless turncoat – will slap the daylights out of them, and smash their grimy cameras. OBJ, too, will curse their grannies, and remind them of their unemployablity and grinding poverty.
Now tell me why a blinking CEO of one micro-finance bank wouldn’t crush their balls, in style, when he couldn’t find his Nokia phone after a press interview.

Ibrahim Idris was just trying to be too nice by allowing his savage yesmen to do the stripping. He could have done it better.
The banker also knows all that a typical Nigerian journalist has are ink and grammar – bad grammar mostly. Nothing to file a suit no matter how he, a cash machine, dehumanizes them. Even their toothless bulldog, the NUJ, can only bark in an angry headline and a couple of paragraphs forcing Idris to apologise only.

It’s high time these journalists knew that every idiot – politician, banker, jackboot, danfo-driver – is aware of their sorry status; that they’re incompetent, free-for-all, brown-envelope-driven, and disorganized.
And as such nobody respects and recognizes them as professional
persons or body that deserves much support when people bullshit them.

By the way,how much butt-kicking does the NUJ need to be as professional and respectable as the NBA, NMA? Or even as the NURTW?

Advertisements

Dora Akuyili and her PR Gymnastics

February 10, 2009

P.R. Blunders
Auntie Dora feels positive thinking could be swapped for good public relations. Why, good p.r is way different from alchemistry or metaphysics.
It’s hopeless trying to make Nigerians feel good in darkness, hunger, poverty , insecurity, inequalities , joblessness and leadership blunders. No matter how many times we dust or kiss the national flag.

She won’t understand this, though . It will take her years of blundering , fumbling, and formal studies in the art of public relations – the Ivy Lee type – before she can function professionally as an image launderer.

Dicky Heart Of Africa
About the slogan, the Heart of Africa is sick. So good riddance! I suggest: the KIDNEY OF YAR’ ADUA. The logo should be a skeleton crumbling under the map of Abuja.Home-grown ,Isn’t it?
So we see how PRO(F) Akunyili will make Nigerians feel this mere geographical contraption is an El Dora do .

Bad Image is Bad Image
The first thing Madam should have done is come to grips with the bloody reality that her boss inherited a poison chalice – bad news, really – and should have, as an awesome p.r. woman she might never be, joined The Sun News and other alarmist
newspapers to scream it in the ears of the sickly president. That what? That Nigeria’s sick. That the situation’s terrible. That Nigerian can never have it worse.

Oh, Auntie Dora of short memory. She’s forgotten, so fast – now that she wines and dines with Yardie – how she used to shed tears – hot tears – for Nigerians in her NAFDAC days. She knew the terrible ways of Nigerians then. She knew how drugs affect women , children , politics, and economy. She knows now nothing
has changed till now except her portfolio – that she was made a
minister of a completely unfamiliar terrain – a propagandist – to sell a confused government to Nigerians and the CNN audience across the ponds.

Certainly, some automatons called Nigerians will tell us all is well.The likes of Daniel Kanu and other bearded zombies.
Remember “Youth Earnestly Asked for Abacha”?

On the whole, one thing is sure : calamity is the best teacher. Gambits like this, in the past, have taught Nigerians,the few real Nigerians, to ignore the charismatic gymnastics of
daydreamers like Madam Akuyili. Nigeria is only sellable when Nigerians are happy.
You can be sure not many serious-minded,breadwinning Nigerians
will find time to participate in the childish logo competition.Doesn’t she know the way of the Power Holding and the internet providers outside Abuja?

Between Face and Grammar

February 4, 2009

Still wondering there are certain grammatical blunders Naija media can’t help committing.
The airwaves are permanently clogged with those silly expressions cockily rapped by 80% of Nigerian broadcast journalists.
One of the most common is : …between you and I.
It hit me square in the jaw when Jumoke Alao of the AIT gracefully spewed out ‘ … the issues in Nollywood that affect you and I ‘ during ESCOOP,8.30am,last Monday.
It was an Africa-wide blunder.

Matter-of-factly, Jumoke is cute.She ranks well in the bevy of well stacked ladies that adorn the DAAR Communications screen. She’s got all the theatrics and seductive body language – great hips, come-hither looks, good skin, bulbs, and all – choreographed to distract the less critical viewers.
But that slip – that bad slip -rubbished her.
Your gut wrenches when a chic journalist like that spits out horrible grammar like she did.

Gone were the days when good journalism was all about creativity and flawless English.
What now qualify you as a female broadcast journalist are your looks, curves, arcs, and whatever coquettish eye contact you can make.
Speak English worse than Man Friday’s – no problem.

I know there are good broadcasters in the AIT :Williams Williams, Uche Unongo, Okechukwu Eze, Kunle Joe ,and a handful of others. See if you can compare these guys with that bumbling Kenny Ogungbe who hides his ugly grammar behind his charisma .He’s no longer in AIT,anyway.

These shameful grammatical slips not only deride the Nigerian media, they also expose the professional rust of the journalists.
It’s a lot easier to hypnotise the viewers with their cleavages – a psychological noise – so nobody hears their blunders.

Breezing through parts of speech and other rudiments of English on a weekend is no sacrifice too big for Jumoke and co. to make. It refreshes their knowledge of conjunctions and cases, and saves them this grammatical suicide. It could save her pretty face, too,from blushes that go with somersaulting into the airwaves.
It’s no picnic trying to strut or bluff your way out of such wreckage,you know.
Even your dumb mike feels the embarrassment, too.

I’d hope that DAARSAT isn’t blasting all this trash across the globe.

Akuyili Needs Brighter Grammar Series

January 21, 2009

Nigerians should begin to hang their heads in shame now as their minister of info. and communication blunders in simple grammar.
You had to be at George Akume’s birthday in Benue state,last week, when she spurted this nonsense:I congratulate you(Akume)for building….
This blunder could have been pardonable in her bedroom, or in an exco meeting with Yar’ Adua, but not before the wall of cameramen and journalists covering the event.
It’s even treasonable for a supposed professional communicator that’s expected to care more for niceties of grammar in public to have made such a dumb mistake.
Obasanjo’s Bell Nursery kids would effortlessly fix this grammatical breach committed by a professor, you know.

Professionalism vs track records
I hate track records,hell knows.
And that’s a pinch of the whole lot of shit with which misplaced track records will smear Nigeria’s ministry of info. and communication.
Boy, how would you compare Frank Nweke – that young,saucy, mischievous apologist of Obasanjo’s – and Ofonagoro,and Chukwumerije – those bad old boys of the khaki regimes – with this pretty madam dressed in a borrowed robe?
Nweke,for instance ,had no track record as a minister. But he had an Advanced Learner Dictionary and something like S.M.O. Aka which he found time to study in spite of his busy schedule.You know he made a smoothing-talking squealer that the BBC respected then.

My fear for Akuyili is: she pretends to be unaware of what over-reaching her ego – in that strange office -could do to her and Nigeria.
Truly, NAFDAC, her former portfolio ,was up her alley because she’s a natural and conscientious narcotic hound. Plus her academic and professional qualification .She was able to do a terrific job sniffing out those drug barons in Aba, Onitsha ,Alaba ,and wherever.And the whole world appreciated that.
But information and communication is a blind alley for her.
She lacks the professional grooming and the perfectionist temperament of a good grammarian that makes a great communicator.

Don’t cringe when you hear her on the BBC and VOA congratulate the nigger in the White House for his success.

DAAR Boss Blunders,too

January 16, 2009

Read anything about the recent maximum blunders of the DAAR Communications boss and his squarest minister of information – Prof.(Pharm.)Akuyili? It’s in the Nigerian Guardian of January 12, 2009.
Can’t Funke Fadugba or some geezer in the NUJ tell these clowns that their scratch-my-back-and-I’ll-scratch -yours tactic isn’t funny?

Truly, I ain’t expecting anything better than that: the shameless pandering of a highly respected professional misfit that Akuyili is by an equally dovish media emperor.

Square Akuyili
I wish Akuyili would go over Dokpesi’s backhand compliments again – the squarest peg for the square hole – and understand that those sycophantic visitors – journalists and their bosses – have their scruples about her competence as information minister. They just can’t scream it in her ears – that she’s square – like those Trojans on the Senate Committee on information and communication did last week when Akuyili was defending her slipshod budget.
And what about the budget? It’s full of generator expenses, renovations, repairs and other silly items. She was careful enough to avoid the Etteh style anyway. Akuyili isn’t even thinking about the FOI bill. What the heck does a narc expert know about FOI? She’s got no 3-or 2- point agenda – like Yardie’s – to make Nigerians take her seriously.

Unprofessional Lying
Worse still, she doesn’t know how to manipulate history to curry favour for her past and present bosses. How would she have made Nigerians swallow that lie – that Obasanjo and his Yaro have been drooling like a rapist over the sexy performance of AIT? Wow!
The DAAR entourage chose to be gulled here. None of them could remember the hunting of Gbenga Aruleba and the fire that gutted AIT Abuja.
Good for them.

Well, she is getting the hang – lying through her teeth, unprofessionally.
That’s Dokpesi’s squarest peg – the best town crier, the one and only government misinformation agent Nigeria can’t afford to lose.
Hope some voyeurs are watching the blind romance between Yardie’s government ineptitude, and the capitalist greed of media moneybags ,like Dokpesi, in Nigeria, as it plays out in this information ministry mal-appointment.

Blunders have Payday

January 12, 2009

Failures are the horrible effects of blunders – professional or ethical – accumulated over times. As financial crises ripple across presses in America so every nation whose press follows that failure pattern will necessary come to grief.The Nigerian press is no exception.
It’s no news again that the American Tribune and other big -time American newspapers are declaring bankruptcy and folding up. ABC and other broadcast stations are also downsizing unprecedentedly. The
surviving ones are pinning their hopes on Obama – maybe his government might interest Americans and change their perceptions of the media. Americans – just as Nigerians –are tired of the press, its poor performance of the information role.
Simply put, these media houses would survive if the Obama government changed journalism in America. What a shame.

Online Journalism
However, there is a thriving brand of journalism that takes the biscuit now.Its growing in leaps and bounds. It’s credible and full of human interests. No gatekeeping. No censoring. No praise singing. It’s blogging – citizen journalism – online
journalism. It’s everywhere, even in the most repressive China, Kenya, Egypt and Algeria.
The tide is gradually changing, too, in Nigeria, especially as more people become cyber-savvy. More than 8 million people now use the internet in Nigeria. The well informed ones go online to select – free of charge – the information they need.
Nigerians are tired of paying N150 to read obituaries, adverts placed by hopeless employment agencies, dead-dry news, sponsored columns, wired news with no local angles.
There’s no reporting again in the Nigerian press.Everybody is a columnist or writer.And when reporting, five reporters – shallow reporters – cluster round a dog-bites-man story of five paragraphs,using shoddy tie-backs to add boringdetails to the story.Samsung, Sound City, Kenny Music and reality shows have taken over the broadcast stations too.
Stories of corruption, government profligate spending,and bad governance go unreported -sometimes reported superficially.
Investigative reporting is dead. The editors cram the pages or screen with trivia.
This is the failure pattern. It’s graphically manifest.

But thanks to citizen journalism. It offers us what traditional journalism cannot – for fear or favour.
Where else can one get the kind of scoop SaharaReporters dishes out daily? What about its investigative style? And the caliber of its columnists? And yet its free.
Already, there are many others competing with the online versions of the newspapers and magazines in Nigeria.
Let’s see in half a decade from now. Some newspapers and mags will die naturally. Readers will go online, and choose what they read.They can also contribute in whatever form they like. Then the Nigerian Guild of Editors,the Nigerian Union of Journalists will be jobless as their profit-conscious media owners go belly-up.

Naija Columnists Manque

December 30, 2008

I read through some ‘TimesofNigeria.com’ today. The writer was
reviewing a number of political columns , the writers and their
blunders – ideological and academic.
The guy was so unsparing in his spankings that I actually felt
he went overboard in the critical review.
I guess I like that, anyhow.

The highest point of his belly-ache with the Nigerian media is
the ego-trip and mediocrity of the likes of Dele Momodu of
Ovation diving headfirst into political pontification.
Dele, an ambitious Yoruba Language graduate from Obafemi
Awolowo University, Ife, accidentally found fame and fortune,
in yellow journalism and publicity.
But how much of a political punditry can we expect from a
circumstantial journalist, a wining and dining one like him?

From time immemorial, I’ve never reckoned with Dele Momodu,
in particular, as a professional journalist. Or his gold- plated
broadsheet as a serious journal. So I can’t figure out whatever
political theories or divide he belongs let alone writes for as
intelligibly as expected of a political journalist.

Francis,the reviewer, should have realized that Nigeria’s political journalists are
products of an unfocused , inconsistent nation. You should
expect such political blunders and ideological daydreaming
from the columnists manque you just reviewed.

And these blunders,if you ask me,will grow worse,and the unprofessionalism will eat deeper into the nigerian media till his kingdom come except Nigeria and her
aging think-tanks are able to stand for something – something
definite – something every Nigerian can sympathise with,
and clutch at tenaciously.
It might not necessarily be the hip thing. It could be stupid,
but let it be methodic.

Naija Sun Blunders

December 23, 2008

I’m going through The Sun Newspaper of Dec. 20,2008.
On the front page is a bad news story.And every idiot in Nigeria
knows that for The Sun, good news is no news.So the writer,Henry
Umahi,or his sub-editor,entitled the story ‘Deadly fury.Robbers kill
8….He then played up the story,making it more unearthly than an
armed robbery incident.

Ugly enough,the over- the- top story expired ten days before.It was
fresher then,and would have been perfect for a news story, not a
dry feature gilded with unnecessary adjectives.

I still wonder where The Sun belongs.A newspaper or a magazine.
You can see its contents are largely features and opinions,narrow
ones.
A newspaper is supposed to give timely accounts of events as
Objectively as possible. The accounts shouldn’t be flamboyant,
wordy,or prosy.Just straight and simple. But here’s the Nigerian
Sun reporting an event that expired weeks back like a scoop.
Would this have been their sub’s oversight or unprofessionalism?
Or was Dec .10,2008, one of those dry days when editors publish
stale news and freshen up decaying one as features?

You almost can tell, with your eyes closed, the body of the story
from its sensational headline.It must inevitably contain:’AK47’;
‘storm the place’;’pump hot leads’; ‘sophisticated weapons’;
’people are feared dead’;and a lexicon of other hackneyed expressions.

One more reason the sub and the writer ought to be jailed for not
murdering the story is its incoherence.
The fourth paragraph states: “Ugwu’s abdomen was pumped with
bullets”.More like the barrel was pointed at Ugwu’s belly,and the
trigger was pulled. And the guy isn’t a goner yet? Only Nigerians
believe shit like this.

And the last paragraph:’He revealed that he was expecting a
report from the DPO….’ Nothing would have been secret about
expecting a police report. Again, for about two weeks he was still
expecting the bloody report. Who was lazy?The Nigerian police
or Henry that wouldn’t follow up on that story.

Let’s overlook the grammatical blunders and Henry’s poor spellings
that stare at us: ‘shooting free’(parag 2); ’ …the only bank… were
persuaded’

May we know what Doyen Mike Awoyinfa thinks about this?

Naija Media Clueless

December 16, 2008

The Nigerian media has come a long way,really.It’s seen lots of ups and downs – privations, gag laws ,clampdowns and all that –
through the years, from the military and the democratised-militarist regimes.

It has also enjoyed it’s moments of glory right from when Obasanjo was trying to demilitarise himself till the rule-of-law chanting era of this dicky-hearted Yar Adua.
 
Unfortunately,the fleeting glory has lulled the NIgerian media into
a professional slumber which has been plaguing the practice.

Even back in the days 0f Dr Nnmidi Azikwe ‘s African Pilot,and Chief
Obafemi Awolowo’s Daily Telegraph,when the media was used as a nationalist weapon against the freaky colonialists,the Nigerian media was just as unprofessional.
Forget Zik’s jawbreakers and Awo’s philosophies.All they did then was apply their creative writings to malign and castigate the imperialists.

We appreciated this,though.

But good journalism goes beyond acidic writings.it involves writing
consistently on clean-cut social or political ideologies and theories.

You figure out this problem better when you realise how Nigeria as a
nation is bereft of concrete,socio-political and enduring economic
theories.
 
And as Mc Quail’s Normative theory states:the media usually takes on
the colouration of its political and economic environment.That means
the Nigerian media will definitely reflect the confusion,barbarism,
and mediocrity of its environment.

This explains why newspapers,mags,radio ,and tv stations mushroom with no intelligible reasons or purpose.

No capitalists.No socialists.No liberals.
Even those who seem to practise social resposibility philosophy have lost their focus.

Newspapers
The likes of the DailyIndependent,The Sun,the Nation, are personal organs of some political fugitives cross carpeting by the day;or at best
they’re mouthpieces of some very important politicians.The Sun, apart
from worshipping Orji Kalu,is extremely alarmist.

The Guardian,as far as ideology is concerned, is a confused  publication
managed by an ideologically divided editorial board.Reuben Abati,one of its prolific columnists,is so unpredictable that he could gall a government today ,and sing that government’s praises to high
heavens tomorrow.He’s got the stuff,but he’s unsure of where he belongs.
On the same board is one Marxist,Edwin Madunagu.He’s another egghead whose socialist rants have a wide readership.But for whatever reasons,he’s working for a hardcore capitalist,Alex Ibru, whose disgruntled workers picket almost everyweek.

Magazine
TELL,NEWSWATCH,THEWEEK ,The NEWS, and tens of others I hate to mention.
TELL and The News came to limelight the same way The African Pilot did: creative but unjournalistic,mainly bent on humiliating IBB ,Abacha,and
other jackboots.
They were hate-filled,acidic writings of some radicals and unguided
revolutionaries trying to prove that the pen was mightier than the sword.

TELL ,among others ,used to be vociferous and investigative,engaging and controversial. But since some of its founding editors – Dare Babarinsa and Ilori – dropped their dane guns to scramble for political posts,that mag,TELL, has become more unfocused.Its classic writing style with its verbiage of apposition,and winding ,modifying clauses,bores you white.
It’s now more commercial,more entertaining,more entrepreneural,and more likely to go obscure.
 
The Source,The Insider and others are just there to help Nigerians know
the name of their president,and retain their English vocabularies.

However , The City People,The Fame,and other softsells are the only mags that seem consistent,by design or otherwise,with the racy ,irresponsible journalism that characterises softsells.

RADIO AND TEEVEE
The most ubiquitous and most boring radio and tv stations are the government-controlled ones: NTA, FRCN. Others that are little bit focused are EKO FM,Ogun Radio and Osun Radio.Nobody rules out their arse-licking and pro-establishment stand.
The PDP actually proliferated radio and tv stations in Nigeria for their
open-secret third term agenda and massive rigging of the 2007 elections.

The private ones – Raypower, Star FM, Minaj, AIT, Channels – are all living up to their commercial expectations. The most professionally run, staffed, and coordinated is Channels TV. Others like Raypower, AIT are filled with tribesmen and sumptuous, wifely ladies who now marshall high offices in the organization. Some of them are zoologists, historians, theartre artists.

Eko FM, Star FM, Cool FM, Rythm are disco stations over-run by deejays,agony uncles and aunties. Some ,among them ,speak like Chamberlain  to seduce their callers. Others of them,like one George Amy, use americanism to cover up their poorly coordinated English and unprofessionalism.

Several factors are responsible for all these:
1. Poor training in journalism.
2. Poor salaries and allowances.
3. The whims and caprices of the owners.
4. Lack of direction by the audience and the country.

However, like you read the other time, Channels TV  is still the one with a difference. It’s focused, consistent, well managed, and professional.
Maybe because the owner,John Momoh, was once a journalist.

In all, for the Nigerian media to live up to its reputation of  professional
watchdogism, it must have some control standard: some self-censorship.

Someone, some organization,some BLOG,like naijamediablunders.
wordpress.com, some publications must be there to critique, correct, review and judge media performance in Nigeria.

There used to be some media review publications back then,and some
tv columns in some of the newspapers. All have fizzled out now. And that’s why media practice is now open to all sorts of abuse.

Towards professionalism
 -There must be some sort of self-censorship.
 -The Nigerian Union of Journalists should professionalise journalism.
 -Proliferation of media reviews, media critique by whoever is competent.

Areas of Concentration
There are unlimited areas of focus,and no doyen of Nigerian journalism can restrict or define the scope,especially in a developing democracy like Nigeria.

Anybody can focus any of the following:
      .language
      .news value
      .writers/presenters
      .Style
      .policies
      .editorials
      .reports
      .character of the media
The list runs on.

With these approaches,the nigerian media could be put on its guard.
It could be made principled,disciplined,andideological . And the audience could be selectively exposed to good English,good programming , good editorials that don’t insult their sensibilities.